I had a tantrum yesterday

June 8, 2011

The two-year-old in me came out for some reason yesterday. I had just come home from a 4-day trip—a trip on which I didn’t cheat on my diet once. Not once! Despite being faced with a container full of my sister’s famous peanut butter cookies. On the last day, I even had a little mini-tub of ice cream in my hand while at Meijer’s. But I put it back. I was proud.

Then I came home to fairly empty cupboards, empty at least of things I am allowed to eat on Atkins. I was annoyed by the lack of progress on the scale and feeling as if it was of no use to stick to this challenging diet for no results. (It’s not true that there have been no results, but more on that in a minute.) I didn’t have the desire or energy to go to the store.

So I had a couple of egg rolls from the freezer. And a frozen lasagna (well, I heated it up first), and a couple of English muffins. This was in addition to a couple of Atkins bars, which I ate simply because they taste really good. It was a bit of a binge. I didn’t eat this all at once, by the way, but throughout the day. And I Just. Couldn’t. Get. On. That. Treadmill. So I didn’t.

Did I feel better after this little rebellion? No, but I didn’t spend the entire day kicking myself either. I wasn’t sure how I was going to reignite my desire to continue on Atkins, but I decided not to worry about it until today.

And today I woke up with renewed energy toward my weight loss regimen. Sometimes all you need is a good night’s sleep, I guess. I worked out (only a partial because I have had 5 days off and I didn’t want to rupture something) but at least I got 20 minutes. And I stuck to my diet all day.

So yesterday was just one of Those Days. The ones Mama told us about and the ones I knew I would encounter on this journey more than once. The key to getting through them, in my opinion, is knowing they will occur and not panicking. I did/do feel a bit panicky about the fact that despite my best efforts, I gained weight last week, but really, that’s no reason to sound the alarm. My brain knows there are several perfectly reasonable explanations that could explain the gain, so I am squelching that panic for the time being.

I am back on track, but I expect that there will be more days here and there in my future where I will feel like throwing in the towel or bingeing. And I am determined to get back on track after each setback.

As another weigh day approaches, I will focus more on the tape measure than the scale, since it’s time for those monthly numbers. Of course, there’s a possibility they won’t show any noticeable difference either, in which case I’m going to have to focus purely on how much better I feel mentally and emotionally. That’s the only area where the improvement is undeniable. Even if that’s the only result I could expect, it would be worth it to continue eating right and exercising regularly.

At least that’s what I keep telling myself. :)

Those Atkins bars I mentioned? Mudslide Marshmallow. Mmmm. Definitely satisfies the sweet tooth.

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